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Saturday, June 13, 2009

sttruggle 4 final


*** arghhhhhhhh.... ***

next week mggu final..15/6/09-19/06/09 then sem break...holiday..huhhh...
bila la nk abs sem nie...xtahan ak rsa...tension dgn mcm2... skt kpla ak dibuatnya...
ak rsau xdpt cgp 3.0keats...ak xnak parents ak bersedih sal nie... ak bkn main2 but kdng2 pa y ak bc xnaik... sdh nya klu sem nie pon xdpt cgp 3....huhhh... sdh sgt... xtaw la nk wt mcm na ag.. ak rsau n tkt kna repeat sbjek math, teori/practise oop, html,networking n suma la.... xtaw nak wt mcm na... rsau sgt,tkt sdh pon da...mcm2 ag la..

setiap kali cti sem ak pasti tkt n rsau jika pa y berlaku msa sem lepas berlaku ag sem nie.. seksa, bowink sgt n xtaw nk wt pa cti sem lepas... ak pon xtaw bf ak bz sgt sem lepas smp ssh nk cnct ak..tue la ak rsau bnda y sma akan berulang... mmg la ak ley lupa but it still in my mind untill i die.. dr mna dtngnya kesabaran ak tue pon ak xtaw..yup...dr start cti sem lepas until awl bln6 nie ak bsbr dgn dya.. time bsdya ak dya xlupa la dya wish..mmg best la.. ak pon xtaw la maybe ak kongkong dya sgt kot @ i'm still not understand him.. dya mcm xnak owg taw sal dri dya..huhhh.. sdih ak...

ak berharap dya akan wt mcm y dya kta la...but sblm couple pon dya ckp y dya perlukan n mcari teman...tpi awl 2bln ja dya ok.. mmg nmpk dr reaksi muka dya mmg berseri2.. mmg lain la pas couple, snyum ja... ak pon xtaw la npa dya dah berubah...pa sbb dya berubah..ak pon xtaw,... sktnya ati bila owg y kta syg xpedulikan kita, jrng nk cnct kita, slalu kita ja cri dya... kdng2 ak rsa mcm dya dah xperlukan ak lagi... ak taw mybe dya bz but xkn sentiasa bz.. xkn xdk msa tuk mkn, mndi, solat, rehat n tdr... ak try fham dya n ckp dgn dri ak sndri y dya bz tue...last smp ak y makan ati sndri.. ak still sayangkan dya walaupun dya xpdulikan ak... ak bkn nk dya 24jam msj dgn ak, duk dgn ak n bsama dgn ak.. but ak jz mtk cikit jer msa dya tuk ak..dlm 24jam y da tue dlm 1-2jam bg ruang tuk ak..n klu bz sgt 30min pon jdi la..

ak xksh klu dya xbls ym/msj ak cz dulu ak pon xska gak owg lmbt bls ym/ msj..lma2 ak dah biasa.. mula2 nak biasakan xmsj mmg ssh gila..but bila dah biasa xmsj, hnst pon rsa mcm xpntg sgt pon... klu bw hnst kuar pon jz tkt parents kol ja/kwn2 nk krim pa2... ak da la hrap dya antq msj but hrpan ak 10% jer.. cz ak taw mmg ssh klu nk dya antq msj kt ak/cnct ak.. klu dya antq msj ak bls la.. sbb belajar dri dya la ak jdi mls nk pgng dgn hnst nie.. ak lebih ska duk dpn pc xpon lepak2 dgn mber ak xpon tgk tv.. kra hnst nie no last la.. agak xbpa pntng n pc ak bnda plng n berharga dlm idup ak..

ak terima andai kta jdoh ak xdk dgn dya xdk... but ak nk berusaha kekal hbngan kmi... bkn ak xska dya dah ok n jdi mcm y ak nak but ak still rsau... ak tkt bila perkara y serupa terjdi blik ak dah xdk kekuatan kesabaran tue lagi n the result we will be frewn only...ak xank pkra tue jadi..huhhh..=( dya pon mgku y dya lma xdk dgn ak..alhamdulilah la dya perasaan gak... pa pon y wt dya berubah...ak bsyukur sgt la... dya xmcm owg lain y ak knl.. dya lain2 sgt..that ak cmfrm.. that make me to know why he so different, wht make him interest pc,networking etc....dgn dya la ak bljr tuk bsabar sgt2...

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